Eat My Shorts! Quotes and Fun Facts pt. 1

J.S.! Have you lost your ever-loving MIND?!?!?

Me: Uh. Have ya MET me?

Why on EARTH would you tell readers to eat your shorts??? Don’t you think that’s kind of…yanno…insulting?

Me: Well, to be fair, I MIGHT think that…except, unlike SOME people who seem to think readers need big red crayons to perceive the painfully self-evident, I have utmost faith in my readers to be smart enough to be able to tell when someone’s being cheeky, versus being an outright asshole. *kaff Trademark trolls! kaff kaff* Sure, Eat My Shorts! is a cocky title, and yes, I used that word deliberately, but it’s also an honest one. It tells the reader exactly what to expect: a collection of hot short stories from a guy who’s crazy enough to 1) admit to BEING a guy and 2) try to compete in the erotic romance arena. As I mentioned in my previous post, I don’t want to try to pretend to be anything other than who and what I am!

So, let’s have some fun!

Random Fun Facts:

  1. The guy on the cover of Eat My Shorts!: Yeah, that’s me. No colorization, only one effect. I did the cover design and art myself, partly to make a not-so-subtle statement about what I think of writers who claim shooting their own models and creating their own covers is something new or unique and partly because, well…if I’m telling you to Eat My Shorts!, I want to be damned sure you’re getting MY shorts and not some rando model’s. It just seems like the polite thing to do.
  2. Seven of the nine stories in Eat My Shorts! are previously released material. HOWEVER! They have all been re-edited, expanded and tweaked to keep the basic story intact, while adding clarity and improving the overall presentation of the story beyond where they were. I’ve evolved greatly as a writer since “Espiritu Sancti,” my first paranormal erotica story, and I want the version readers see now to hopefully be superior to the version which was released in Red Roses and Shattered Glass back in the day while still honoring my journey and allowing the reader to accompany me on it.
  3. These stories include LGBTQ and hetero erotic romance across a variety of ethnicities and races. Why? Because I refuse to “stay in my lane,” “write only what I know” and all those other lovely euphemisms for not getting out of your comfort zone. Margie Church once told me to “put my head in a box” when I expressed some trepidation about writing gay werewolves. As it turned out, with the guidance of Bryl R. Tyne, the results were actually better than I could realistically have expected and I’m damned proud I took the leap of faith which became “Dancing on Flames” and its never-released sequel, “Silver and Air.”
  4. Rights to all previously-released stories herein have reverted back to my sole control and ownership.

So, with generalities out of the way, here’s some quotes and more story-specific facts about Eat My Shorts!

This line, from my high fantasy story “Ancient Magic,” is hands down my absolute favorite single line I’ve ever written. It’s simple, evocative and packs a lot of meaning into only fourteen words. “Ancient Magic” was originally released as part of the Timeless Desire anthology from Noble Romance Publishing.

Let me state, for the record, that Ruby Green is an absolute lunatic…and I mean that in the the best and most complimentary way! When she first broached the idea of Lesbians vs. Zombies: The Musical Revue, I was skeptical, to say the absolute least. And yet there was a part of me that, after sleeping on it for a few nights, decided it was just crazy enough that I had to try it. “Dead Means Dead” also got one of the nicest reviews I’ve ever had the pleasure of reading, so it’s great to get this story back out into the world once again!

Next up on our lineup of “ideas so crazy I had to try them,” this one was inspired by a writing prompt put out by Changeling Press entitled “The Real Sock Thief.” I’d been wanting to do a lighter, more humorous story for a while, something to stretch my comedic chops while still bringing the sexy heat, and this seemed like the perfect opportunity. Of all the stories I’ve ever written, this one is probably one of my top three favorites. (Shhh…yes, yes, I KNOW you’re not supposed to have favorite children, thanks!)

“Silver and Air” was originally intended as the sequel to “Dancing on Flames.” After Noble Romance Publishing imploded, I spent years looking at this story, giving it a paragraph here, a chapter there, but I never quite felt it was “right.” Then, a few months ago, I turned my attention back to it and decided it was high time Keith Silverskin and Taté finally got their chance to shine. This book posed some unique challenges and forced me to consider some uncomfortable truths about myself, but I think this single work, more than any other, has made me a better human being in many ways!

In “A Demon for Dinner,” I DIDN’T want to write the stereotypical romance heroine. I wanted a “real” woman, with real body image issues, and a love interest who would see her for everything she was and desire her for, rather than despite, it. When I pitched this story, I was told it would never sell because “Lesbian romance doesn’t sell. Lesbian romance written by a man has exactly no chance in the marketplace.” So now I say, “Let’s just see about that!”

Stay tuned for more on Monday, when I release my favorite lines from the remaining stories in Eat My Shorts!: The Absolute Best of J.S. Wayne (…So Far…). If you like what you’ve seen, or know someone who might, please help me spread the word. Stories don’t mean a thing if people don’t read them, and I’d love to know my tales have found good homes with readers who will enjoy and cherish them.

Now it’s time for a break, and a well-earned beer with the girls of House Unicron. Ciao for now, folks!

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