Welcome to the Flames of Desire Blog Hop! It’s wonderful to be here, working with so many wonderful authors and, of course, hanging out with all you fantastic readers!
One of the toughest things about romance is how to express it with a significant other in ways which don’t get stale. We break ourselves, our hearts and our bank balances looking for love—and when we find it, we often find ourselves falling into patterns which work for us, but deny us spontaneity.
The romance genre is a wonderful tonic for this. As well as (we hope) telling a great story and allowing us an escape from reality, romance offers us possible ways to admit and express our deepest desires and needs to ourselves and our intimate partners.
Ironically, one of the most intensely romantic and erotic scenes I ever read was not in a romance novel at all, but Robert R. McCammon’s The Wolf’s Hour, a book about a WWII-era werewolf fighting for the Allies. In this book, Michael Gallatin, the werewolf, presents a lover with a rose, which he promptly uses in, er, inventive ways to seduce her. If the mark of a great scene is how well it sticks with you in the years to come, this scene more than passes the test of time for me…it’s been in my mind for over half my life!
Of course, Michael Gallatin wouldn’t have considered the erotic potential of the thorns, which as a Dominant and Sadist I absolutely do.
This doesn’t mean you have to use, or accept the use, of a rose complete with thorns in your romantic play! Some people enjoy such things and find them quite pleasurable. Yes, even the thorns. Some people would look at such a scene and shake their heads.
The point of this post isn’t to try to singlehandedly boost the rose market, but to point out how even something as simple and basic as a rose can be used in unexpected ways to pleasure a lover!
Take a look around you right now. Go ahead. I’m not going anywhere.
What do you see around you which might add something different to your demonstrations of romance? That bathrobe tie hanging off the bedroom door might be a surprising portal to a very enjoyable night, if you bring it to your lover and say, “I’d really like you to tie me down and have your way with me.” A bouquet of roses needs no explanation at this point, one hopes. No matter how prosaic the item, as long as you consider basic safety and your partner’s preferences, you might be surprised how even the gentlest touch of an object you might not typically consider romantic can be a powerful bonding experience!
Of course, if you don’t have a partner (yet), this doesn’t mean you’re out of the club and don’t get to play! When you’re single, you can experiment and explore without having to worry about whether someone else thinks what you’re doing is weird, unusual, abnormal or even a deal breaker. Even better, you can learn what works for you so when you do meet the right partner for your needs, you can express your needs and desires without fear, shame or regret.
Not every experiment is going to be successful, and that’s okay! What matters is that you keep trying to keep things interesting and exciting for you and your lover(s). As long as you keep doing that, you’re probably in a really good position to have a wonderful Valentine’s Day, no matter who your lover is!
So, to finish out this post, I’d like to know: What is YOUR “rose?” Do you use the thorns, so to speak? And if so, how? Remember, one lucky commenter will receive a copy of my sci-fi menage romance, Dusk, as well as getting entered for a lot of other really cool prizes from Safari Heat, so be sure to leave your email address with your comment!
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